Fragile Little Doll
by secretfanficlover
Summary: House: Hufflepuff Year: 4 Category: Standard Prompt: [Object] Parents scarf Word Count: 1986 Warnings: Depression, Suicide. Mild Luna loses her mother's scarf, but finds something more important in the process.


**This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.**

House: Hufflepuff

Year: 4

Category: Standard

Prompt: [Object] Parents scarf

Word Count: 1986

Warnings: Depression, Suicide. Mild

**Fragile Little Doll**

Everybody already thinks Luna is strange, what she wears is often a topic of discussion. If only they were able to look a little further, they would notice the obvious addition to her already strange wardrobe choices.

Her mother's navy blue scarf had always given Luna a feeling of warmth and comfort away from her home. She started out just sleeping with it wrapped around her neck like a boa constrictor. After Voldemort returned, she found it was safer to stay at school over the holidays. This meant she couldn't continue her tradition of sneaking into her mother's dresser that still had all her clothes. Luna could imagine it still smelled like her, making her to feel safe, stopping bad memories and setting her mind at ease.

She had always been fragile. Her friendships with the golden-trio, Weasleys' and Neville made her feel like she could be herself, but underneath the cheerful, happy-go-lucky exterior, lurked a dark side that threatened to overwhelm her. Nobody really knew what she was struggling with underneath the surface.

Her mother's scarf became her lifeline, her protection from the darkness. Her dad never understood. He always thought Luna's breakdowns were due to hexes or something. Her problem had been passed down to the next generation from mother to daughter.

She never thought of the night her mother died. Luna kept the memory of her mother's suicide locked inside a steel vault inside her head.

"Hey, Luna," Harry said smiling at her, "Lovely scarf you are wearing." The comment took her by surprise, nobody had noticed it before. Of course, she wasn't always seen in Muggle clothing, but over the school holiday Hogwarts let the students wear whatever they chose to.

"Thank you, Harry," she said, "It actually means the world to me. It used to be my mum's, you know?"

The implication of her words resonated with Harry, he knew he acted similarly with objects he received belonging to his parents. He cherished every possession that had belong to them and took every measure to ensure their safety. Therefore he didn't carry them around for the whole school to see, and for it to potentially get lost.

"Well, it is very pretty on you," he responded, making her beam. "There is that pretty smile," he said almost in reaction and her cheeks went pink.

"Hey, Harry, you wouldn't maybe be interested in going out sometime, just us?" Luna asked hesitantly.

The hesitant look on her face showed Harry that she meant it to be a date. He did have feelings for Ginny, but it was clear Ginny wasn't interested in him, so where was the harm? Luna was like a China doll, beautiful, fragile and breakable, and he wanted to protect her.

"I just want to be completely honest. I am interested in somebody, but that person doesn't feel the same way. So I am willing to give this a chance," he said, gesturing between the two of them.

"Works for me," she responded, beaming delightfully.

The day of their first date arrived. They decided to go to Honeydukes together and have an ice-cream together. Luna was wearing a lovely dress of the same navy blue as her scarf. She felt comfortable around Harry, so the protective garment was left back at the school in her trunk.

"I really love that colour on you." Harry complimented her when he saw her in the dress.

As it was a date, Harry took her hand as they walked, happily chatting as they went through some of the shops, browsing the items for sale.

They fell into comfortable silence for a while, just enjoying the company. Harry liked Luna, and he enjoyed holding hands with her, and the thought of them dating didn't seem silly to him anymore. She was beautiful. His beautiful little China doll. He paused and just looked at her, and he noticed something more, the feeling of wanting to fit in, to belong, to blend in.

"Never tone-down how amazing you really are," Harry said to her, surprising her.

"Amazing?" she blushed as he nodded.

"Absolutely," he responded, suddenly nervous. "Luna, will you be my girlfriend?" he asked.

She nodded, wordlessly, and without thinking, he leaned in to kiss her on her rose-red lips, pulling her into his arms. She responded, kissing back passionately.

Luna had never been this happy before. She had Harry, who she saw every day. He made her happy in a way she never believed she could. She kept falling more and more in love with him every single day.

One day, Luna saw Harry chatting with Ginny. They seemed to be discussing something, and Ginny was smiling and laughing. _It seems like she is flirting with him._ Her insecurities sprang to the surface immediately. She couldn't help but walk over to them and lean in to kiss Harry hello before greeting Ginny. Ginny was being as nice as ever, and she seemed silly for overreacting. Harry cared about her now, he was over Ginny. He would never hurt her. In the back of her mind she fleetingly compared his sweet kisses to the warmth of her mother's scarf.

"Hey there, doll. I'm happy to see you as well," he said with a smile at the enthusiastic greeting. He kept in in mind that he needed to reassure her he was dating _her _and Ginny was no longer a threat to her.

"What was so funny?" Luna asked, hating the curious edge to her voice.

"Ginny was just telling me how she caught Ron and Hermione making out in a broom cupboard." Harry explained, putting her mind at ease.

That night Luna couldn't sleep. She knew she couldn't get to Harry, so she decided to resort to a different measure of keeping the light going in the dark night. _The scarf._

She rummaged through her trunk, suddenly it occurred to her. It wasn't there! Somebody had stolen it! Without it she couldn't sleep, it seemed the monsters had gained enough confidence to reach out from under the bed to try and pull her under. She was sitting against the headboard, curled up tight into a ball, her arms around her so tight it made her muscles hurt, but she didn't move, she just sat there staring out at the window. She watched the light rise as the sun came up and the shadows disappeared, but she couldn't move. She seemed to be frozen in fear.

That morning another female Ravenclaw found her, staring off into space, muttering to herself. Some of the girls in her dorm was aware of her odd mood swings and one pulled her by the hand all the way to the hospital wing. When Harry found her she was unconscious. Madam Pomfrey had decided it was best to sedate her for a while to have her get some proper sleep.

The girl that found her was relieved when Harry showed up, she seemed to find the whole thing very inconvenient for herself. "She was muttering about a scarf," the girl said before disappearing off into the hallway.

_It was just a piece of cloth_, the other girl thought to herself, _she could easily just buy another one, couldn't she?_

Harry understood she was going through a lot, the pressure must have been more than he ever thought before. His doll was cracking, and he was convinced he would find the scarf and bring her back to normal. He hoped soon it would be enough for him to be there and make her feel confidence in herself to chase the darkness away, but for now… he was determined to search every inch of the castle until he found the scarf. He was going to help Luna, no matter what. First things first, he needed that navy blue scarf.

He searched everywhere he could think of. Seeing Luna often, and she wasn't recovering fully. One afternoon, Harry broke down and cried, he pulled her gently into his arms, stroking her hair.

"I promise I will do whatever it takes to make you better again, my love," he said. A tear fell from his cheek to Luna, and her eyes fluttered open groggily.

"Harry, what's going on?" she said softly.

"Luna, you're awake," he responded wiping away the tears. She was okay after all.

"Maybe your light managed to chase away the darkness," Luna replied.

"Love, I can't find the scarf, but I will keep looking for it," he said gently.

Luna nodded sadly. "I just wonder who would have done something like that.."

She seemed to get better for a while after that, and Harry remained true to his promise to find her light in this dark new world. She seemed fine by his side, but that just made him more anxious to leave her alone for too long.

Weeks passed, and he was still no closer to finding a solution. Harry was becoming desperate.

_Maybe he could replace it? _he thought. He could say he found it, so he looked everywhere for a shop that sold scarves in the same colour as Luna had. It cost him quite a bit of money, but he managed to get one, as well as a bottle of the perfume Luna's mother wore before the night she took her own life.

When Harry presented Luna with the scarf, she eyed it curiously. When he handed it over she felt it, holding it against her pale cheek, before suddenly tossing it to the floor.

"Why are you trying to trick me?" she tried to yell, but she had been so withdrawn it came out at a much softer volume.

"My love. I just want to make you happy," Harry said, miserable at failing her again. Slowly, with Harry's help and support, she started learning to cope without the scarf, learning that there was always a flame in the darkness. She became more confident in her own skin, due to Harry's kindness and love, his support made her strong.

The two love-birds often wondered what happened to the navy blue treasure. _Who had taken it? Why would they steal it?_

The next time Luna went home, Harry came with her to meet her dad, officially, since he was now dating her daughter. They walked into the house hand in hand, and she gave her dad a quick peck on the cheek. Out of habit, she almost pulled Harry towards the door where her mother's dresser stood. "Doll, we need to have a talk." Harry said, Mr Lovegood nodding in confirmation.

"Please take a seat, Luna." Mr Lovegood said to her. She looked wairy.

"Love, we both care about you." Harry started once she was seated. She nodded in confirmation before the men carried on talking.

"My daughter, you are growing up, you know we are surrounding you with love. Your mother is inside all of us, we don't need trinkets to remember her by, all we need is to love each other she lives on through us. We are willing to help you get better, finding the right way to handle things." Mr Lovegood said, his face showing his emotion. This discussion was hard for him, but he knew it was the only way for Luna to get better. She was his only child and for her, he would do anything.

As Luna stood in her bedroom alone later that day, talking to the portrait of her mother. She realized that they were right. She was clinging to the past, and nothing good ever came of focusing so much on the past that one forgets to live. This message was sad but also powerful. Luna hoped that from now on she would manage to look to the future. Silently thanking her blessings that she had such a great support system in her life, with them, she would not only manage to survive the darkness, she would thrive in it...


End file.
